Rant Thread!

[1984]

Do not feed doughnuts to your obese children
You will regret it when they’re in their teens
Maccas might shut them up now that they’re seven
But they won’t forgive you when
They’re getting picked last for PE
Don’t you see?

So you telling me that your family
Has a history of obesity
You got a wire loose in your pituitary
It’s just the way that God made me

It’s unlikely, statistically
To be a physical thing
But either way it don’t explain why you
Are in the cue at Burger King

You can blame it on biology
You can blame your physiology
You can point to genealogy
And your social anthropology

You can say you are an ectomorph
That you just can’t get the kilos orf
Well you can be what you wanna be
But stop feeding that boy KFC

He weighs 30 kilos and he’s only three
He looks like a clean-shaven Pavarotti

Switching to Diet Coke is not the way back
Boombalata motherfucker
Your kid’s a fat, have you noticed that?
Your 5 year old princess in her size 14 tutu
Only eats pizza like that because you do
And you, ought to be ashamed
For you have only got yourself to blame

Will be dead of a heart attack
Before your grandchildren are ten
Perhaps you’ll consider
A cut-back on extra fries then

Boombalata kiddie-stuffer
Have you noticed that your kids are fat?
What are you gonna do about that?
What are you gonna do?

So you�re telling me that your family
Has a history of obesity
You got the polycystic ovaries
Your mum had childhood diabetes

But � and in your case
There’s a fucking big butt
Do you think it’s an appropriate treat
The all-you-can-eat at Pizza Hut?

There’s no excuse you silly goose
For a child with a caboose
Like a moose who�s eaten too much mousse
It�s tantamount to child abuse

Kick them off the fucking couch
Unplug the Playstation
Send them down to the park
If they don�t wanna go, make ’em

Tell them they have to jog
Until their jogging shorts fit ’em
If they hesitate, ask firmly
If they still resist, hit ’em

Is this what you want for your girl and your guy?
These chips off the pork chop, for the toffee apples of your eye?
Kit Kats in value packs are not the way back
Boombalata Motherfucker
Your kids are fat, did ya notice that?

And you, you should feel ashamed
For you have only got yourself to blame
Your 6 year old miniature Jabba the Hut
Eating half melted Mars Bars from the folds of his gut
He’ll be looking for a kidney
Before your grandchildren are ten
Perhaps you’ll consider
A cut-back on Taco Bell then
Perhaps you’ll consider
A cut-back on Krispy Kreme doughnuts
And Popcorn in bucket-sized boxes
And microwave pizza or drive through McDonalds
For weeknightly dinners in front of the TV
And notes to the phys-ed instructor saying
Timmy has asthma but he really just gets short of breath
Cos he’s 35 kilos above the ideal weight
Of 35 kilos for a nine year old boy

rarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

[Gylfi Gudbjornsson]

@Pike Tom Us 414396 wrote:

militant drug use! finally passed out about 3am- not long after i posted

raa man, mind you, i didn’t sleep until about 5:35am….not good

[Gylfi Gudbjornsson]

@Pike Tom Us 414396 wrote:

militant drug use! finally passed out about 3am- not long after i posted

raa man, mind you, i didn’t sleep until about 5:35am….not good

[General Lighting]

I find it difficult to sleep sometimes and I take no other drugs than alcohol these days..

[General Lighting]

I find it difficult to sleep sometimes and I take no other drugs than alcohol these days..

[Gylfi Gudbjornsson]

@General Lighting 414486 wrote:

I find it difficult to sleep sometimes and I take no other drugs than alcohol these days..

well, quite the opposite sir, i drink far too much near on everyday yet i still have trouble sleeping. Hopefully tonight will be different as i managed to get out on my skateboard today after like 2 months of not skating….thats like 2 months worth of energy blown today!
om actually yawning at 9:11pm this is a goooood sign!

[Gylfi Gudbjornsson]

@General Lighting 414486 wrote:

I find it difficult to sleep sometimes and I take no other drugs than alcohol these days..

well, quite the opposite sir, i drink far too much near on everyday yet i still have trouble sleeping. Hopefully tonight will be different as i managed to get out on my skateboard today after like 2 months of not skating….thats like 2 months worth of energy blown today!
om actually yawning at 9:11pm this is a goooood sign!

[Anonymous]

:O they’re raising VAT?! how cheeky.

[Anonymous]

:O they’re raising VAT?! how cheeky.

[General Lighting]

@harr!et 414574 wrote:

:O they’re raising VAT?! how cheeky.

to be fair this was mentioned in the Budget for some months… even so in the UK we pay much less of our wages in taxes than many other EU nations. We can’t have it all, low taxes and public services (consider how much it costs for instance to subsidise your age group to travel free on public transport…)

[General Lighting]

@harr!et 414574 wrote:

:O they’re raising VAT?! how cheeky.

to be fair this was mentioned in the Budget for some months… even so in the UK we pay much less of our wages in taxes than many other EU nations. We can’t have it all, low taxes and public services (consider how much it costs for instance to subsidise your age group to travel free on public transport…)

[1984]

can you tell a green field, from a cold steel rain?

sometimes I cannot. *sigh*

And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?

sometimes I fear so *secondary sigh*

[1984]

can you tell a green field, from a cold steel rain?

sometimes I cannot. *sigh*

And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?

sometimes I fear so *secondary sigh*

[Anonymous]

@General Lighting 414578 wrote:

to be fair this was mentioned in the Budget for some months… even so in the UK we pay much less of our wages in taxes than many other EU nations. We can’t have it all, low taxes and public services (consider how much it costs for instance to subsidise your age group to travel free on public transport…)

i don’t travel free 🙁 costs me a fiver to get to college each day.
i’m moving to america, they pay less in taxes i think.

[Anonymous]

@General Lighting 414578 wrote:

to be fair this was mentioned in the Budget for some months… even so in the UK we pay much less of our wages in taxes than many other EU nations. We can’t have it all, low taxes and public services (consider how much it costs for instance to subsidise your age group to travel free on public transport…)

i don’t travel free 🙁 costs me a fiver to get to college each day.
i’m moving to america, they pay less in taxes i think.

[1984]

@harr!et 414607 wrote:

i’m moving to america, they pay less in taxes i think.

hope your well off, not a good place to be poor is the old USA

[1984]

@harr!et 414607 wrote:

i’m moving to america, they pay less in taxes i think.

hope your well off, not a good place to be poor is the old USA

[Anonymous]

i have family there who own something to do with oil.. i’ll sponge off them ;D

[Anonymous]

i have family there who own something to do with oil.. i’ll sponge off them ;D

[1984]

@harr!et 414614 wrote:

i have family there who own something to do with oil.. i’ll sponge off them ;D

ooo get the fuck over there then, long as its not the deep south. I would like to live there if things work out. But fear mental health problems of the past will make me an unattractive prospect. But then they have no NHS so maybe it wont bother them.

Need to get to get the fuck away from this country thats for sure, but at the same time want something nice and comfortable. Asia does not appeal for all its financial advantages. If anything just because I am so useless with languages.

Whereabouts in the USA would you like to go? only been once myself, to San Diego.

.

[1984]

@harr!et 414614 wrote:

i have family there who own something to do with oil.. i’ll sponge off them ;D

ooo get the fuck over there then, long as its not the deep south. I would like to live there if things work out. But fear mental health problems of the past will make me an unattractive prospect. But then they have no NHS so maybe it wont bother them.

Need to get to get the fuck away from this country thats for sure, but at the same time want something nice and comfortable. Asia does not appeal for all its financial advantages. If anything just because I am so useless with languages.

Whereabouts in the USA would you like to go? only been once myself, to San Diego.

.

[Anonymous]

i’ve been to new york, south carolina, new mexico, utah, wyoming and colorado but the family live in denver so i spend most of my time in colorado. new mexico was my favourite (but the hottest), they seemed to have just a load of native americans loitering around, it was a nice change from the scummy chavs around here. hoping to head out there again in the summer 😀 i wish i could get out there in a month for the superbowl but college is a bitch.

it’s difficult to get residency in america, i think if you have a criminal record then you’re screwed, especially for drug offences. but it’s a lovely place, the mountains are wonderful. i want just a little woodland house by the side of a lake in the mountains where i can retreat and paint :O that would be my dream. i agree with needing to get away from this country. i bet san diego is awesome! haven’t made it as far as california but it must be so pretty.

[Anonymous]

i’ve been to new york, south carolina, new mexico, utah, wyoming and colorado but the family live in denver so i spend most of my time in colorado. new mexico was my favourite (but the hottest), they seemed to have just a load of native americans loitering around, it was a nice change from the scummy chavs around here. hoping to head out there again in the summer 😀 i wish i could get out there in a month for the superbowl but college is a bitch.

it’s difficult to get residency in america, i think if you have a criminal record then you’re screwed, especially for drug offences. but it’s a lovely place, the mountains are wonderful. i want just a little woodland house by the side of a lake in the mountains where i can retreat and paint :O that would be my dream. i agree with needing to get away from this country. i bet san diego is awesome! haven’t made it as far as california but it must be so pretty.

[1984]

@harr!et 414616 wrote:

i’ve been to new york, south carolina, new mexico, utah, wyoming and colorado but the family live in denver so i spend most of my time in colorado. new mexico was my favourite (but the hottest), they seemed to have just a load of native americans loitering around, it was a nice change from the scummy chavs around here. hoping to head out there again in the summer 😀 i wish i could get out there in a month for the superbowl but college is a bitch.

it’s difficult to get residency in america, i think if you have a criminal record then you’re screwed, especially for drug offences. but it’s a lovely place, the mountains are wonderful. i want just a little woodland house by the side of a lake in the mountains where i can retreat and paint :O that would be my dream. i agree with needing to get away from this country. i bet san diego is awesome! haven’t made it as far as california but it must be so pretty.

Nice! Wish I had seen that much of it, plan to do a road trip drive across it type thing one day. Nice big cadalac or something.

I have no criminal record so that’s all good. San Diego was okay, very business like (went with my dads company). Wouldn’t want to live there.

[1984]

@harr!et 414616 wrote:

i’ve been to new york, south carolina, new mexico, utah, wyoming and colorado but the family live in denver so i spend most of my time in colorado. new mexico was my favourite (but the hottest), they seemed to have just a load of native americans loitering around, it was a nice change from the scummy chavs around here. hoping to head out there again in the summer 😀 i wish i could get out there in a month for the superbowl but college is a bitch.

it’s difficult to get residency in america, i think if you have a criminal record then you’re screwed, especially for drug offences. but it’s a lovely place, the mountains are wonderful. i want just a little woodland house by the side of a lake in the mountains where i can retreat and paint :O that would be my dream. i agree with needing to get away from this country. i bet san diego is awesome! haven’t made it as far as california but it must be so pretty.

Nice! Wish I had seen that much of it, plan to do a road trip drive across it type thing one day. Nice big cadalac or something.

I have no criminal record so that’s all good. San Diego was okay, very business like (went with my dads company). Wouldn’t want to live there.

[Author]

Posts