Express Something Thread

[Deez]

@know_hope 550417 wrote:

lol, thats what i’ve been doing in my little middle england village gym that just opened recently, haha… i used to love the gym but not the memberships, but this one does 1 month rolling contract so i’m loving it… i actually quite like some of the music. the beats and production in some of it is top draw, just i can’t really relate to the lyrics, tho the rhythms are nice at times. im probably the thinnest guy there, but its ok, we’re all on our own journey. i can already feel its improving my strength in just over a month and i’m getting quite a tumping badminton smash now 🙂

I don’t train in a gym but we all have to start somewhere. I can’t really relate to murdering people either but the beats are nice and the aggression helps. Btw make sure your diet is in check and if you need any advice or anything feel free to PM me 🙂

[know_hope]

@Deez 550418 wrote:

Btw make sure your diet is in check and if you need any advice or anything feel free to PM me 🙂

thanks 🙂

[MR207]

Waking up to find that you’ve texted someone in mid-sleep and your text doesn’t make sense <<

[Deez]

I seem to come to this thread a lot lol. Just 26 days and I will be on MDMA fucking loving it to this tune. Been to long.

[know_hope]

@MR207 550448 wrote:

Waking up to find that you’ve texted someone in mid-sleep and your text doesn’t make sense <<

lolz!

mobile (cell) phones are radioactive… it might be an idea to leave the phone somewhere else when you sleep and try to find a not too displeasing alarm clock… that will also solve your sleep texting issue… unless you sleep walk also and find your phone… i’m not sure what the solution to that would be >.>

[season.]

@MR207 550448 wrote:

Waking up to find that you’ve texted someone in mid-sleep and your text doesn’t make sense <<

LOL this has happened so many times.

Yes ketamine was involved//

[Izbeckistan]

sometimes I do wish I was sinhld bleurgh.

[Deez]

@Izbeckistan 550511 wrote:

sometimes I do wish I was sinhld bleurgh.

As it happens, I wish I was sinhld all the time!

[Deez]

This tune makes me want to take multiple fat bong rips *sigh*

[Izbeckistan]

@Deez 550516 wrote:

As it happens, I wish I was sinhld all the time!

single* (im a bit pissed as it happens!)

[Deez]

@Izbeckistan 550518 wrote:

single* (im a bit pissed as it happens!)

Really? I couldn’t tell 😉

[MR207]

[Izbeckistan]

@Deez 550519 wrote:

Really? I couldn’t tell 😉

I’m not the sharpest tool in the dinner set as it is, let alone when i’m monged out :p

[know_hope]

i had a dream that i went to work, had a bad day, got ill, came home and crashed in bed… then woke up confused with ‘amelie’ music in my head, with the day of work still to be done 😕

[MR207]

Are there certain people who just make you boil inside.. like really put you over the top? I don’t know what I’m feeling right now but I’m just filled with this sad/rage/anger feeling and I’ve never been so mad in my life. I’m just venting I guess, but I’m also looking for some sort of advice too. I honestly feel like two different people. To the whole world, friends, strangers I’m this bubbly girl who laughs a lot and wants to help everyone. To my mom and dad and siblings I’m a disappointment. I can’t tell any of them how I truly feel because they wouldn’t understand. This happens constantly and I’m really getting sick of it because it tears me apart inside and it’s wearing me down to my core. I wish I could take their words in one ear and out the other but I can’t. They just stick with me and eat away at my mind.

The situations are so crazy to me, so out of place and it seems like i’m the only one who sees it. It’s so ridiculous that I actually think that they’re stupid. At times it’s so bad that I don’t even feel like I belong. Yet everybody else can get away with things but when I do the same, everything blows up in my face and everybody is against me. I feel that I am always looking at the big picture and doing the rational thing. When something like this happens I feel trapped because everybody gangs up on me and I’m just trapped with my awful emotions and thoughts.

The worse thing of all is that I channel all of this sadness and anger into bad things like alcohol. The easy thing to say in a situation like this is to channel my emotions into something that I like to do like painting or writing. The problem is that all of these emotions feel very physical like a volcano about to erupt so it’s really hard for me to just sit down and paint a picture. It’s almost like I blackout and I do something to hurt myself like chugging two bottles of wine and just passing out so I don’t have to deal with my emotions. This can’t be normal. I continue to do bad things because of the way I feel all the time. I’m the kind of person that would be so built up by my feelings to not think and grab a bottle of pills and swallow all of them, not even thinking about the consequences.

I never feel this way when I’m around anybody else though, I’m fun and confident and always happy so what’s going on? My family turns me into a completely different person. It’s funny because I’m the one always giving advice to my friends but in reality I’m the one who really needs it. I try to help everyone and it’s working against me because I don’t focus on how I feel. I’ve never told anybody about this either so this is the first time I’m asking for advice. It’s gotten out of control. How can I deal with these emotions and my family better?

[The Psyentist]

@MR207 550794 wrote:

Are there certain people who just make you boil inside.. like really put you over the top? I don’t know what I’m feeling right now but I’m just filled with this sad/rage/anger feeling and I’ve never been so mad in my life. I’m just venting I guess, but I’m also looking for some sort of advice too. I honestly feel like two different people. To the whole world, friends, strangers I’m this bubbly girl who laughs a lot and wants to help everyone. To my mom and dad and siblings I’m a disappointment. I can’t tell any of them how I truly feel because they wouldn’t understand. This happens constantly and I’m really getting sick of it because it tears me apart inside and it’s wearing me down to my core. I wish I could take their words in one ear and out the other but I can’t. They just stick with me and eat away at my mind.

The situations are so crazy to me, so out of place and it seems like i’m the only one who sees it. It’s so ridiculous that I actually think that they’re stupid. At times it’s so bad that I don’t even feel like I belong. Yet everybody else can get away with things but when I do the same, everything blows up in my face and everybody is against me. I feel that I am always looking at the big picture and doing the rational thing. When something like this happens I feel trapped because everybody gangs up on me and I’m just trapped with my awful emotions and thoughts.

The worse thing of all is that I channel all of this sadness and anger into bad things like alcohol. The easy thing to say in a situation like this is to channel my emotions into something that I like to do like painting or writing. The problem is that all of these emotions feel very physical like a volcano about to erupt so it’s really hard for me to just sit down and paint a picture. It’s almost like I blackout and I do something to hurt myself like chugging two bottles of wine and just passing out so I don’t have to deal with my emotions. This can’t be normal. I continue to do bad things because of the way I feel all the time. I’m the kind of person that would be so built up by my feelings to not think and grab a bottle of pills and swallow all of them, not even thinking about the consequences.

I never feel this way when I’m around anybody else though, I’m fun and confident and always happy so what’s going on? My family turns me into a completely different person. It’s funny because I’m the one always giving advice to my friends but in reality I’m the one who really needs it. I try to help everyone and it’s working against me because I don’t focus on how I feel. I’ve never told anybody about this either so this is the first time I’m asking for advice. It’s gotten out of control. How can I deal with these emotions and my family better?

That all sounds quite normal to me. It seems like you are ready to fledge the nest. You reach a certain age and you are ready to spread your wings and find your own way in life; this can’t be done whilst surrounded by families members trying to offer their choice of direction or asking for direction themselves. Not to say you should abandon them but spare some time for yourself, then come back to them, if you so desire.

Is moving out a possibility for you right now?

[The Psyentist]

Me…. surging with anger right now. Itching for a fight.

Sad psyentist:cry:

[season.]

i got on this plane to Greece and now uhehm i;m there

[The Psyentist]

@season. 550841 wrote:

i got on this plane to Greece and now uhehm i;m there

???

[know_hope]

@MR207 550794 wrote:

Are there certain people who just make you boil inside.. like really put you over the top? I don’t know what I’m feeling right now but I’m just filled with this sad/rage/anger feeling and I’ve never been so mad in my life. I’m just venting I guess, but I’m also looking for some sort of advice too. I honestly feel like two different people. To the whole world, friends, strangers I’m this bubbly girl who laughs a lot and wants to help everyone. To my mom and dad and siblings I’m a disappointment. I can’t tell any of them how I truly feel because they wouldn’t understand. This happens constantly and I’m really getting sick of it because it tears me apart inside and it’s wearing me down to my core. I wish I could take their words in one ear and out the other but I can’t. They just stick with me and eat away at my mind.

The situations are so crazy to me, so out of place and it seems like i’m the only one who sees it. It’s so ridiculous that I actually think that they’re stupid. At times it’s so bad that I don’t even feel like I belong. Yet everybody else can get away with things but when I do the same, everything blows up in my face and everybody is against me. I feel that I am always looking at the big picture and doing the rational thing. When something like this happens I feel trapped because everybody gangs up on me and I’m just trapped with my awful emotions and thoughts.

The worse thing of all is that I channel all of this sadness and anger into bad things like alcohol. The easy thing to say in a situation like this is to channel my emotions into something that I like to do like painting or writing. The problem is that all of these emotions feel very physical like a volcano about to erupt so it’s really hard for me to just sit down and paint a picture. It’s almost like I blackout and I do something to hurt myself like chugging two bottles of wine and just passing out so I don’t have to deal with my emotions. This can’t be normal. I continue to do bad things because of the way I feel all the time. I’m the kind of person that would be so built up by my feelings to not think and grab a bottle of pills and swallow all of them, not even thinking about the consequences.

I never feel this way when I’m around anybody else though, I’m fun and confident and always happy so what’s going on? My family turns me into a completely different person. It’s funny because I’m the one always giving advice to my friends but in reality I’m the one who really needs it. I try to help everyone and it’s working against me because I don’t focus on how I feel. I’ve never told anybody about this either so this is the first time I’m asking for advice. It’s gotten out of control. How can I deal with these emotions and my family better?

sometimes the most difficult relationships are with family. with you parents its the longest relationship you’ve had with the longest habits, good or bad; its a whole life of decisions from when you had no knowledge until now. as time passes new people come into your life and you get to ‘start a fresh’ with them and are more able to remove parts of your behaviour that you see as erroneous… but with your parents the habits remain and the decisions you made through all your phases of development do also, and conversely the same applies to them too: all the decisions they made when you were at different phases of your life with differing needs; they may not always adjust to the each stage well, they may not adjust well at all.
but regardless of how they behave to you and how you have behaved or reacted in the past, there is always opportunity to make a different decision the next time. if you see every irritation as a chance/challenge to develop yourself then you can reach a new maturity and can go up rather than down. that said, its not easy: emotion, especially if its anger comes up fast and once you’re in the state of emotion you are relinquishing your ability to make new decisions and will continue to conform to the habits of the past.. and when this emotion arises with your family you have all the habits of however many years old you are to stand up to, as do they. but if you find you are overcome by emotion, go easy on yourself; just having awareness that you’d like to make a different decision the next time is the beginning of a new direction, and perhaps next time you’ll be ready.
to make a new direction is like walking against the tide, when you begin the current is strong, but one by one, as each potential stress arises and you ‘step up,’ you’l find the force against you weakening.
i think with family its good to remember that (as the saying goes), you can’t choose them… you can only accept them, and if they do things that have tended to distress you in the past, perhaps think of the good things they have done for you and/or the sacrifices they’ve made for you. or, in more extreme situations, just having the awareness to realise that they too are lost in confusion, emotion and habit, but that doesn’t mean you have to respond equally, nor does it mean they don’t love you. we always have a choice. if you can learn how to not react to behaviours that distressed you before, then you may find your relationship with them/ that person will develop, and they may appreciate your change as it has broken a pattern, a pattern that with your family may have continued for a loong time.

as i write this i think of how i can improve the situation with my parent. we’re all on a journey.

‘if you think you are enlightened, spend a week with your parents’ ~ ram dass

hope that helps 🙂 x

@The Psyentist 550821 wrote:

Me…. surging with anger right now. Itching for a fight.

Sad psyentist:cry:

aw, fly don’t fight 🙂

@season. 550841 wrote:

i got on this plane to Greece and now uhehm i;m there

bring back some sisa for the pv crew then? ^^

and i’d just like to add:

COME ON ANDY MURRAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:weee:

[know_hope]

i bought some beefcake online and they sent me a free shaker and a pack looking distinctly similar to a manufactured research chem pack, only they supposedly contain the legal high; caffeine. i’m wondering if i should empty a couple out and rail them, then i’ll be able to compare them to insufflating the rc; camfetamine 🙂

[ATTACH=CONFIG]85525[/ATTACH]

what d’yer reckon?

[MR207]

@The Psyentist 550820 wrote:

That all sounds quite normal to me. It seems like you are ready to fledge the nest. You reach a certain age and you are ready to spread your wings and find your own way in life; this can’t be done whilst surrounded by families members trying to offer their choice of direction or asking for direction themselves. Not to say you should abandon them but spare some time for yourself, then come back to them, if you so desire.

Is moving out a possibility for you right now?

I know moving out would be just what I need but no unfortunately, it’s not 🙁

I’m really tight on money but I’m saving up for an apartment and trying to spend more time by myself because I get overwhelmed really easily

[MR207]

@know_hope 550862 wrote:

sometimes the most difficult relationships are with family. with you parents its the longest relationship you’ve had with the longest habits, good or bad; its a whole life of decisions from when you had no knowledge until now. as time passes new people come into your life and you get to ‘start a fresh’ with them and are more able to remove parts of your behaviour that you see as erroneous… but with your parents the habits remain and the decisions you made through all your phases of development do also, and conversely the same applies to them too: all the decisions they made when you were at different phases of your life with differing needs; they may not always adjust to the each stage well, they may not adjust well at all.
but regardless of how they behave to you and how you have behaved or reacted in the past, there is always opportunity to make a different decision the next time. if you see every irritation as a chance/challenge to develop yourself then you can reach a new maturity and can go up rather than down. that said, its not easy: emotion, especially if its anger comes up fast and once you’re in the state of emotion you are relinquishing your ability to make new decisions and will continue to conform to the habits of the past.. and when this emotion arises with your family you have all the habits of however many years old you are to stand up to, as do they. but if you find you are overcome by emotion, go easy on yourself; just having awareness that you’d like to make a different decision the next time is the beginning of a new direction, and perhaps next time you’ll be ready.
to make a new direction is like walking against the tide, when you begin the current is strong, but one by one, as each potential stress arises and you ‘step up,’ you’l find the force against you weakening.
i think with family its good to remember that (as the saying goes), you can’t choose them… you can only accept them, and if they do things that have tended to distress you in the past, perhaps think of the good things they have done for you and/or the sacrifices they’ve made for you. or, in more extreme situations, just having the awareness to realise that they too are lost in confusion, emotion and habit, but that doesn’t mean you have to respond equally, nor does it mean they don’t love you. we always have a choice. if you can learn how to not react to behaviours that distressed you before, then you may find your relationship with them/ that person will develop, and they may appreciate your change as it has broken a pattern, a pattern that with your family may have continued for a loong time.

as i write this i think of how i can improve the situation with my parent. we’re all on a journey.

‘if you think you are enlightened, spend a week with your parents’ ~ ram dass

hope that helps 🙂 x

That is just what I needed to hear! At times it’s really hard but yes they do a lot for me that I don’t even notice, I’m sure I need to be more respectful. I hold so much inside that when something makes me the least bit irritated I just snap and let it all out. I don’t think before I act, it’s actually the opposite.. which obviously would result in problems. I’ll say/do something and then after I’ll be like “what did I just do? And why did I do that?” Then I’ll spend hours regretting it. So.. next time I’ll think 🙂 That definitely helped, thanksss 🙂 :group_hug

[DaftFader]

@know_hope 550900 wrote:

i bought some beefcake online and they sent me a free shaker and a pack looking distinctly similar to a manufactured research chem pack, only they supposedly contain the legal high; caffeine. i’m wondering if i should empty a couple out and rail them, then i’ll be able to compare them to insufflating the rc; camfetamine 🙂

[ATTACH=CONFIG]85525[/ATTACH]

what d’yer reckon?

U mad bro?!

Just cos it says “6 pack” on them, don’t mean they beefcake!

[Deez]

Wrong thread… don’t mind me…

[Author]

Posts